So I Think I'm Part Israelite....

My epic journey through the Bible has brought me to Numbers and to the middle of the desert with everyone's favorite Biblical complainers, the Israelites. They complain about everything. We don't have food. Now we have food, but it's not good enough because it isn't meat. We used to have lots of food when we were slaves. We want to be slaves again. Moses is a bad leader! He brought us out here to kill us. They're some hard core complainers.

I'm starting to get rather annoyed with them. Much like I get rather annoyed with my students when they complain about assignments, class activities, or anything. I just want to go back in time, grab some Israelites, and yell at them. Do you not remember how bad it was for you in Egypt?? Do you not remember how badly you wanted out?? Have you forgotten how God worked to free you? I mean there were plagues; water turned into blood....how do you forget that? Moses didn't bring you out here to kill you--you asked to get brought out here! And the food thing. Do you not get that every morning God provides for you? Sure, manna might not be the most delicious thing ever, but it gives you what you need. God brought you out of slavery, parted a sea for you, gives you food everyday, and you have the audacity to say that that's not good enough? That you deserve more? Oh, wait. There is more. He's promised to give you a land of your own, and with all the cool stuff He's been doing for you, you shouldn't doubt that. You should be excited, expectant. The promise of that should be enough for you. Knowing you've been saved and knowing you will one day get your promised land should be good enough for you.

I have a slight tendency to rant when I get frustrated or annoyed.... but back to the point.

The truth is if the Israelites could time travel to today, they could look at me and say the same things to me. God brought me out of my slavery to my sin nature, and He used something more than plagues. He used His Son. But I often willingly go back. Anyone who knows me could fill you in on some of my more habitual sins, ironically including the fact that I'm a chronic complainer. I'm not thankful for how God provides for me. I have a job, which as a teacher these days is actually saying quite a lot. But I complain about my students and how much work I always have. I complain that I don't get paid enough, especially since I started looking at houses. I'm not thankful for what God has given me--I just look at it and, like the Israelites, think it's not enough. And like the Israelites, I get frustrated with my desert sometimes. Life gets really hard, and instead of finding joy and comfort in the fact that God is with me, I get negative and focus on the bad things, on how hard something is. Instead of resting in the promise of my promised land, heaven, I just think about how I'm not happy in the moment.

As it so often is, it is easier for me to look at the Israelites and see their sin than it is for me to see my own. And, because I'm judgmental, I read about them and think how horrible and ungrateful they are when really I should look at them and see myself. And when I start to get annoyed and angry with them and just feel like I've had enough, I should become even more thankful that God doesn't feel that way about me.